Last week, I told you about Anne who was facing issues in her marriage and trying to figure out how to move forward. This week is the first entry from her which describes some of the awkwardness involved with deciding to split and the logistics of making that happen.
The house officially hit the market this week and all my energy has gone into getting the house ready for a photographer and viewers. The process has been not only physically, but emotionally exhausting. Doug and I had to work pretty closely to get it all done, which only reminded me of how great a team we were setting up the place when we first moved in. The late night trips to Home Depot, sitting in our new living room on lawn chairs, him working super hard to remove the Pepto-Bismol-pink tiles in the bathroom because they were making me queasy, waking up at dawn to stand in line for that new bottom-mount fridge on sale at Sears. I took down most of our smiling pictures and replaced with some generic stuff, but I really didn’t know if I should wrap and pack them or rip and burn them. I still haven’t decided but they remain intact for now.
Interesting stuff I found:
1. A card from me thanking him for finally cutting his long hair 4 years ago.
2. Two movie ticket stubs for Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Sqeakuel (I know for sure he took one of his ladies to see that one. They also had McDonald’s for dinner that night).
3. My undergarments beneath his pillow (huh?)
4. A LOT of adult moviesFortunately, we got through it without any hostility and the house looks pretty good. I just found out that the neighbour 2 houses down is also putting up their house, except theirs is slightly bigger and they are asking $5,000 less! But I’m sticking to my asking price (I need to so that I can break even) and seriously hoping it sells quickly so we can get out of this very awkward living arrangement. It’s becoming harder–not easier, as I thought it would–to watch him get ready (cologne too? really?) and go out without asking him where he’s going and who he’s going with. I’m quite sure I don’t want to know the answer. The question is, though, why is it so easy for him to go out anyway? We have a baby! Before I can go anywhere I have to secure a babysitter, but when he’s ready to go out, he’s just gone, leaving behind a cloud of that cologne. Humph. I hope it makes her sneeze. (Hmmm…Not sure if it’s pathetic or admirable that a sneezing fit is the worst I’ve wished on his girl(s)).
I’m heading back to work tomorrow after 9 months of maternity leave. It’s a new role and when I find out the salary that goes with it I’ll know if it’s a lateral move or a promotion. I’m very excited. Nervous too, but mostly excited.
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I think it’s admirable…….and I’m admiring the courage so beautifully shining through this update.
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Shannon Reply:
February 5th, 2010 at 12:42 am
She asked me what I thought when she sent me the journal entry and that’s what I told her too. i can really get a feel for where she’s at.
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Wow. What a situation to be in. I wish her luck at her first day back to work. That can be hard on so many levels when you’re leaving a baby at home.
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Shannon Reply:
February 5th, 2010 at 12:42 am
Yes, having so much at once both concerns me and I think might be exhilarating at the same time.
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Wow…what a strong person she is! No way in hell could I live under the same roof as my ’soon to be’ ex-husband.
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Shannon Reply:
February 5th, 2010 at 12:43 am
I know, right? She’s doing what’s best for her child though and remaining civil.
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Can’t comment on anyone’s marraige ex or otherwise but I do know a little about selling houses. She either wants the house to sell quickly – or she doens’t If she want’s out fast the price is gonna have to meet the market – that’s the reality – $5000 doesn’t sound like much to me to get out of a nasty situation
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Shannon Reply:
February 5th, 2010 at 12:43 am
I currently have a house for sale and feel the same way. I think I would lower the price too.
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I was in a similar situation, (living together til the house sold)for a short time and it was a nitemare. My advice would be to get out as fast as possible. my ex and i are both pretty calm people normaly, but my situation got pretty ugly pretty fast. But i wish you good luck. oh and burn the pictures!
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Shannon Reply:
February 5th, 2010 at 12:44 am
Ha. Good advice.
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She is one strong woman. I would have already devised a plan to remove his balls and kick him to the curb with his cologne.
Yes, burn those pictures. I would need to do something to release that rage. Well, I would have rage. Anne doesn’t seem to have any rage. Sneezing fit? Admirable, not pathetic.
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